158 - Guilt, Grace & Growth: What Parents with Chronic Illness Need to Hear with Hilary Hodge
In this episode of The Inclusive Dad podcast, host AAron sits down with author and advocate Hilary Hodge to explore the realities of parenting with a chronic condition. Hilary shares her journey through severe asthma and Addison’s disease, the lack of resources for parents navigating hospitalizations, and why she wrote a book to fill that gap. Together, they discuss guilt, identity, invisible struggles, communication scripts, and building supportive community. This conversation shines a light on the daily resilience of millions of parents worldwide and offers practical tools for raising children while managing unpredictable health challenges.
Key Takeaways:
Big-Tent Inclusion — Chronic conditions affect millions, and Hilary emphasizes broad, compassionate definitions that make space for anyone who identifies with the experience.
Guilt Reframed — Parents often feel they’re “not enough,” yet their lived experiences and intentionality often make them extraordinary caregivers.
Normalize the Conversation — Honest, age-appropriate scripts help children understand health conditions without fear, pairing information with reassurance.
Community Matters — Finding or building supportive networks reduces isolation and helps families feel seen, understood, and empowered.
Ask for Help Wisely — Support doesn’t have to be huge; small reciprocal acts create sustainable systems of care for families managing chronic illness.
Hilary Hodge’s definition of inclusion:
Inclusion is that parents feel seen because so much of living with a chronic condition is invisible.
Hilary Hodge’s Bio:
A champion of parents with chronic health conditions, Hilary’s writing and classes provide parents with age-appropriate strategies, tools, and scripts for talking to their children about their illness, hospitalizations, medical emergencies, heritable conditions, and much more.
As a mother with two diseases, Hilary draws on her own experience as well as more than 100 hours of interviews with parents, child psychologists, teachers, and medical professionals. Hilary has worked as an author and editor for Oxford and Cambridge University Presses, Pearson, and National Geographic. She is also an adult education expert and served for many years as the Associate Vice Chancellor of Adult Education for the City Colleges of Chicago. She is currently finishing the book The Art of Parenting While Sick.
She is the patient co-chair of the severe asthma arm of the European Respiratory Society and leads frequent trainings to help families plan for medical emergencies.
She holds a BA in Spanish, Italian, and Philosophy from Kenyon College and an MA in Linguistics from the University of Florida. She is the Director of the Angers Literary Festival and lives in the Loire Valley in France with her husband and son.
Connect with Hilary Hodge:
Website: https://hilaryhodge.net/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hilary.hodge.7
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hilaryhodge/
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/hilary-hodge-216b6110/
SPAM© Count:
Host:
Yes
Current Guest:
No
Cumulative Guest Stats:
Yes - 65
No - 91
☕ Buy me a Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/theinclusivedad
Subscribe to Podcast Newsletter: https://www.theinclusivedad.com/podcastupdates
Want to be a guest on Inclusion and Advocacy from a Parent's Perspective: The Inclusive Dad? Send Aaron DeVries a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/theinclusivedad
Hilary Hodge
Champion of Parents with Chronic Health Conditions
A champion of parents with chronic health conditions,
Hilary’s writing and classes provide parents with age-appropriate strategies, tools, and scripts for talking to their children about their illness, hospitalizations, medical emergencies, heritable conditions, and much more.
As a mother with two diseases, Hilary draws on her own experience as well as more than 100 hours of interviews with parents, child psychologists, teachers, and medical professionals. Hilary has worked as an author and editor for Oxford and Cambridge University Presses, Pearson, and National Geographic. She is also an adult education expert and served for many years as the Associate Vice Chancellor of Adult Education for the City Colleges of Chicago. She is currently finishing the book The Art of Parenting While Sick.
She is the patient co-chair of the severe asthma arm of the European Respiratory Society and leads frequent trainings to help families plan for medical emergencies.
She holds a BA in Spanish, Italian, and Philosophy from Kenyon College and an MA in Linguistics from the University of Florida. She is the Director of the Angers Literary Festival and lives in the Loire Valley in France with her husband and son.